Friday, September 30, 2011

And A Good Day To You Too Sir!

The young, not-so-gentle man who paid us an unannounced visit during the pre-dawn hours last Friday, decided to return 4 days later at 2:23 am, to star in his 'surprise, welcome back' bash which my husband and I had been all too eager to throw in his honour. He was greeted with a very rusty cutlass blade to his scalp and forehead, as my skilled, cutlass weilding husband lept through the air on spotting his shadow through our bedroom window, firing chop after chop. He (the thief) screamed in pain as he bled profusely while simultaneously trying to descend the building's exterior with his life, and I screamed in synchronization for added dramatic effect. Though we were disappointed that he failed to catterpult to the warm concrete pavement waiting below to cushion his fall, we were equally entertained when he less than gracefully landed on the 3rd floor balcony railing, where he managed to successfully scare the dickens out of the old, retired spinster and her sole housemate - her feline companion. From there, he skillfully made a cat like descent down the walls of the building's exterior, until he safely landed on the sidewalk, where he proceeded to squeal in pain from his freshly carved face, while skeedaddling to a presumably safer haven. Too excited to sleep, my husband and I spent the rest of what should have been our slumber filled hours, repeating the aforementioned events (which sadly only lasted for a few seconds) to each other. My husband's favourite part was obviously his handywork, and my favourite was getting to hold my husband by the feet, while he dangled precariously out of the window and over the balcony to continue presenting his gift to our expected, uninvited house guest.